


Dueling Club

by ProgramasaurusRex



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:28:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28353933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProgramasaurusRex/pseuds/ProgramasaurusRex
Summary: No matter how busy he was during his student years, Severus always made time for the Hogwarts Dueling Society. It was a place to learn new skills, blow off steam, and meet other students with similar interests.
Relationships: Remus Lupin/Severus Snape
Comments: 6
Kudos: 38





	1. First Year

It was a cool Saturday morning in October, and Severus Snape was sitting in his dormitory with his roommates, Julius Mulciber and Robert Avery. The three of them were trying to decide if they should attend the first meeting of Professor Flitwick's new Dueling Society.

"They're not going to teach us anything really interesting," Julius groaned, laying back lazily on his bed. "Probably just how to do shield charms and stun each other."

"All the more reason we should go," Robert pointed out. "We already know enough interesting spells to do some damage. The Gryffindors won't know what hit them."

"They'll probably make us all practice the same spells at the same time, like they do in class," Severus pointed out. "We aren't going to fight properly. It's all stylized, the bowing and everything, like in fencing."

"What's fencing?" Julius asked, looking over at Severus.

Severus reddened. "Nothing," he said, picking up his pillow and holding it to him.

"A muggle pastime, is it?" Julius asked, a definite edge on his voice.

Severus didn't know how to answer. Julius had been his roommate for two months now, and Severus had been trying very hard to avoid negative attention from him. So far Julius hadn't actually gotten into any fights, but he was big for his age, and something in his bearing suggested that he'd be a dangerous foe. An important part of Severus' placating strategy was maintaining that he loathed all things muggle and his father in particular, which usually wasn't difficult because Severus genuinely held few good memories of the muggle world. But he'd spent eleven years there, so he couldn't help himself from occasionally slipping.

"Come on, Severus, what does it mean?" asked Robert in a friendly tone. "Do they build fences for fun?"

Severus looked down. "Sword fighting," he grunted.

"They stab each other with swords?" asked Robert. "But that must be dangerous for muggles. They don't have proper medicine, do they?"

"They aren't really sharp," Severus explained. "They use thin little bendy swords. They put coloured chalk on the tips, so it leaves a mark when you manage to poke your opponent. Then you get a point."

Robert nodded. "So you're saying Flitwick won't let us hurt each other really. It's more of a game."

"Of course he won't," said Julius.

"He represented England in the Dueling Finals a few years ago, you know," Robert pointed out. "I'd like to see his technique, anyway. And I heard some of the girls might come, too. You could land a spell on Mistress Mary, Jules."

Julius brightened at this suggestion. He'd formed an oddly intense dislike for a prim muggleborn Gryffindor girl in their year called Mary Macdonald in their first week of class.

"Right, I'm in," he agreed.

"Severus?" asked Robert.

"Yes, I'll come," said Severus, who had rather fancied the idea of learning some extra self defence from the start. The Slytherin first years had been hazed rather extensively their first week of school, leaving them with an eagerness to gain some practical magical prowess as quickly as possible. Besides, Severus found himself naturally attracted to the creative power of the Dark Arts.

No sooner had they arrived than James Potter and Sirius Black walked through the door, followed by their roommates, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. Robert nudged Severus and jerked his head in their direction. Suddenly, Severus was very glad he'd come.

All his life, Severus had struggled to make friends with muggles in his neighborhood and at school. His mother had soothed him by telling him that it was because he was a wizard, and that one day he'd come to Hogwarts and meet other boys who were like him. She'd spoken fondly of her friends in Slytherin. That she never seemed to have any contact with her magical friends as an adult didn't matter; it was a chance. Now that Severus was here, he was delighted not to have to hide his magic, to be able to share it with his new friends. But his muggle upbringing threatened to divide him from the others, just as his magical parentage had divided him from the others at Spinner's End. Yet, when the Gryffindors were around, the Slytherins automatically closed ranks. That nudge from Robert was a valuable prize for which Severus had been working quite hard.

Then, Lily Evans walked in with Mary Macdonald and Marlene McKinnon.

"Excellent," whispered Julius. "The Scotch lasses."

Julius had given the three Gryffindor girls in their year this nickname due to their red hair and Mary and Marlene's last names. The girls had also become fast friends. Everybody at Hogwarts seemed to stick close to their roommates. Although he hated to be separated from her, Severus was glad Lily had some girl friends and was safe from awkward questions about her muggle parentage. Mary and Marlene seemed nice enough girls. It was true that Mary was on the studious side, always asking lengthy questions in class, but Severus couldn't blame her for her enthusiasm for magical scholarship. It was something a pureblood like Julius could never understand, having had free access to it all his life.

Unfortunately, this did leave Severus caught in the middle between Lily and Julius.

"I think Julius might have a wee crush on one of the Scotch lasses," said Robert.

Severus sighed in relief. A perfect excuse to stop them from interacting.

"I think you're right," Severus agreed. "Jules and Mary. They might have some lovely tall children together, you know, build a nice manor with sixteen foot high ceilings."

Julius, normally the dominant one of the group, bore their combined teasing with ill grace. "I wouldn't look at a muggle born girl," he shot back. "Unlike Severus, here, with his little Scotch neighbor."

"Lily is just a friend," Severus protested. "She was the only witch I knew apart from my mother growing up."

"That just leaves Marlene for me, if we're house hopping," Robert mused. "And she's the only pure blood of the bunch. Big wizarding family, the McKinnons, actually, five or six siblings. Shouldn't wonder if this whole school is overrun by ginger haired Scotch kids in twenty or thirty years."

"The McKinnons are an old family, yes, but all blood traitors," said Julius, turning serious. "That would be a step down for an Avery."

Robert's family was higher on the pureblood hierarchy than Julius', which made it odd that Robert was so good natured. Then again, perhaps not. A boy with Robert's pedigree could afford to relax, while a boy with a couple rumored muggle great grandparents had to fight a bit harder to prove himself.

Robert shrugged. "Right then, it's agreed, all the Scotch lasses are off the table. Perhaps the Ravenclaw girls will shape up nicely in a few years."

Severus wasn't sure why his friends were so interested in girls; surely they were all a bit young? Or was scoping out pureblood matches at an early age a pureblood thing? It was so difficult sometimes, trying not to make a mistake. Best not to say much at all.

"Welcome to the Dueling Society," Flitwick was saying. "We will start off with a review of basic etiquette. All duels will start off with a gracious bow of the head."

Julius and Robert looked at Severus, acknowledging that he'd been right.

"Please find a partner," Flitwick was telling them.

Quick as a flash, Julius and Robert had paired up, as well as James and Sirius, Lily and Mary, Marlene and Peter. Severus found himself left with Remus Lupin, whom he didn't know very well. In fact, he estimated that Remus was in a similar position with his pureblooded roommates, James and Sirius, as Severus was with Julius and Robert. Two boys left without a partner after the rest had paired up.

Remus bowed politely to Severus, who bowed back.

"Disarming only," Flitwick told them. "Expelliarmus is the spell. Please speak clearly and keep your wand movements very crisp."

But Severus caught a glimpse of Julius out of the corner of his eye, and he knew what he had to do to score a much needed point today. As far as he knew, Remus was not particularly friends with Lily, and he had thrown in his lot with James and Sirius. Remus was nothing. Remus was collateral damage.

"Furnunculus!" Severus shouted, pointing his wand at Remus, who immediately broke out in boils.

Remus put his hands to his face in horror. The whole class was staring at him. A couple of third year Slytherins burst out laughing, and soon half the room had joined in. Flitwick scolded Severus and put Remus right, but the mood in the room had darkened.

Julius patted Severus on the shoulder approvingly and whispered, "Nice one, Fencing."

James Potter was glaring at them, and even Lily looked surprised. Severus had faintly hoped she would be impressed. He tried not to look at Remus.

The next bout, Remus hit him with Petrificus Totalis.

Severus fell to the floor on his back. He couldn't exactly blame Remus, or begrudge him the looks of approval he was getting from James, Sirius, Peter, and the Scotch lasses. One did what one had to do.


	2. Silencing Charms

In second year, Julius started casting a silencing charm around his bed hangings at night before going to bed. Severus looked curiously at him, then at Robert, who winked in return. Severus walked over to Robert's bed and sat down.

"Why do you suppose he's doing that, then?" Severus whispered. "Do you think he's having nightmares?"

Robert just chuckled. "Because he wants a wank, I suppose," he said, rolling his eyes. "Clever of him, really, to think of a silencing charm. I just try to get on with it quietly."

"A wank? What's that?" asked Severus.

Robert just stared at him. "You don't know what wanking is? Really?"

Severus blushed. "Is this a pureblood thing?"

Robert burst into laughter and refused to tell him anything, which was odd because he was normally fairly accommodating.

The next day at break time, Severus strode into the library, located the big dictionary on its stand, and flipped to the "W" section, hoping the word was spelled like it sounded. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be there.

Severus decided to ask Madam Pince, who had always been very helpful to him in his studies in the past.

"Excuse me, Madam Pince," he said, "but what is a wank?"

Madam Pince took off her glasses at him. "Severus Snape, you leave this library immediately!" she hissed.

Severus protested, but she shooed him out. As he left, she called out, in an exasperated tone, "Boys!"

This was most unusual. The word must refer to something very dark indeed, perhaps something in the Restricted Section. The Slytherins knew what it meant but wouldn't tell him. The teachers knew but didn't want him to know. He'd been thinking about asking Lily, but if it was something dark or pureblooded then she probably wouldn't know, either. He wondered why his mother hadn't told him about it, then remembered Pince's comment about boys. Could it be some secret knowledge passed down from wizard father to wizard son?

Severus didn't have much contact with any non-Slytherins, except through Dueling Club. Attendance at the club had dwindled this year to about a dozen serious students. As he thought about the other students in the club, he decided who he would ask.

Remus Lupin knew more about the Dark Arts than anyone else in their year apart from Severus himself. He had a wizard father, but wasn't a pureblood. He was all right when his friends weren't around, which they hadn't been in Dueling Club much this year. Remus seemed mature and discreet, like he wouldn't tell anyone. And although he was very well behaved, something in his manner suggested to Severus that he wasn't as naive as he looked, that he had a spot of Darkness in him, too.

After their meeting that Saturday, he caught up to Remus.

"Nice Blasting Curse," Severus said as they headed out into the corridor. "You just about destroyed that mannequin."

"Thanks," said Remus. "You did pretty well, too."

Severus paused. "Remus, I was wondering if I could ask you about a magical term I haven't been able to figure out."

"All right," said Remus.

"It's called a wank," said Severus.

Remus stopped walking and folded his arms. "Yes, very good, now pull the other one," he said. "Honestly, I was beginning to wonder if James and Sirius were right about you, but of course they were."

"What do you mean?" Severus asked. "Why won't anyone tell me what it means? Is it something very Dark then?"

Remus gave him the same look Robert had. "You're not winding me up?" he asked quizzically. "Really?"

"I swear I'm not," said Severus. "I've already asked my roommate, the dictionary, and Madam Pince. Can you please just tell me what it means?"

Remus laughed so hard he had to stuff a fist in his mouth. "You asked Madam Pince? Sweet mother of Mary, I wish I'd been there."

He pulled Severus into an empty classroom and shut the door. "Snape, I swear to Merlin if I find out you're winding me up, I'll ..."

"I'm not, really. But how can everyone else know what it is but me? I'm one of the best in our year at Defence," said Severus.

Remus sank down against the wall and patted the spot next to him. "It's nothing to do with magic," he said. "I don't know how you got that idea. As far as I know, muggle boys do it just as often."

"Well, I heard Avery use the word," said Severus, "and usually when Avery and Mulciber use words I don't know, it turns out to be some pureblood thing. I grew up in the muggle world, you see. And then the other night, Mulciber cast a silencing charm around his bed, and I asked Avery if he knew why, and Avery said Mulciber wanted a wank, but he wouldn't tell me what it was."

Remus burst into fresh giggles. "That's more than I ever wanted to know about Julius Mulciber's wanking habits. But Avery wouldn't tell you? Why not?"

"How can I know why not until you tell me what it is?" asked Severus impatiently.

"Well, it's the sort of thing boys often learn from other boys," said Remus. "Their older brothers or their friends, usually. It was James who told me about it. But it's rather private, you know, not something you talk about in polite company. You're not, er, very close with Avery and Mulciber, then?" he asked.

Severus looked down. "Sometimes they're all right," he said. "My best mate has always been Lily. I suppose she wouldn't know about it because she's a girl?"

Remus sighed. "No, probably not, as she's only got a sister. Well, fine then, funny as it would be to see who else you asked, I suppose I'd better just tell you."

But at that moment he blushed and stopped talking.

Remus breathed in. "Right, well ... do you ever ... think about girls?"

Severus didn't know how to respond to that. He had figured out by now that most boys his age did think and talk about girls quite a lot. Severus didn't really know what all the fuss was about himself. But he supposed he'd better say yes. Technically it wasn't a lie, because he thought about Lily from time to time, although not in an obsessive way.

"Yes," he said uncertainly.

Remus gave him a knowing look.

"Well," said Remus, "sometimes, late at night, alone in their beds, older boys will think about girls, until their ... penis gets hard. Then they ... ah ... rub the penis, and eventually a sort of white sticky mess comes out."

"Why?" asked Severus.

"Because it feels good," said Remus. "That's why Mulciber cast the silencing charm, because sometimes when boys do it, they make ... noises, happy noises, and it's rather embarrassing. It's polite if you live in a dorm not to let on that you're doing it, or that you hear anyone else doing it. Rather impossible to get any privacy in a school like this when you share a bedroom."

"Do you do it, then?" Severus asked.

"Well, yes," said Remus, "sometimes. All boys start doing it when they get to be about our age. Apart from feeling really good, if you don't do it for too long, the sticky stuff comes out on its own when you're sleeping. Haven't you ever had a dream about, you know, sex, and then woken up with a mess in your pants? You do know what sex is, right?"

Severus frowned. "Yes, my mother told me where babies come from," he said absently. "I do get the sticky stuff sometimes in the morning. I suppose ... I should have a go at this wanking then."

But as he thought about the last time he'd woken up with a mess in his pants, he recalled the dream he'd had the night before, and it hadn't been about a girl.

"I don't know how to do it, though," he said.

"Don't worry about that," Remus assured him. "Just close the hangings around your bed, cast a good silencing charm, and stick your hand down there. You'll know what to do; it's instinct."

"Thank you for telling me, Lupin," said Severus, blushing. "I'll kill Avery. I can't believe I asked Madam Pince!"

Remus grinned. "She must have thought it was a dare," he said, patting Severus on the shoulder and getting to his feet. "Don't worry about it. I know what it's like to be the odd one out."

Severus stood up, too. "Well, I'll see you at Dueling Club," he said awkwardly.

"See you," Remus agreed, then left.

That night, Remus closed the hangings on his bed, cast a silencing charm, and put his hand down his pyjamas. For some reason, as he began to rub himself, he thought of Remus knocking him on his back in a Full Body Bind curse.


	3. Hospital Wing

Severus lay in the hospital wing, his useless rubbery legs propped up by a pillow. On the other side of the room lay Remus, surrounded by James, Sirius, and Peter, all happy chatter and pats on their friend's shoulder, still excited from the big fight. Sat down on Severus' side were Julius and Robert, who seemed unconcerned about his injury.

"You might have at least Shielded one of us," Robert pointed out. "That's not against the rules, and it's only common courtesy."

"You're wasting your time," said Julius. "Severus doesn't get it, and he never will."

The original argument had been between Julius and James, over the previous day's Quidditch match and who ought to have won it. Sirius and Robert had quickly jumped in after wands were drawn. Severus had simply stood there, watching, his wand still in his pocket. He didn't know why his instinct hadn't been to cast a shield charm on one of them, which was supposedly the polite thing for wizards to do. Was he a coward? It hadn't mattered, anyway. James and Robert had cast spells at the same time, causing them to rebound and hit Severus and Remus, who hadn't been fighting either.

"I'm sorry," Severus said, uncharacteristic in his direct humility.

"Yeah, all right," said Robert, and the two of them left.

The Gryffindors stayed for what seemed like ages. Severus rolled over, hoping to fall asleep, pretending not to envy his fellow invalid. Eventually they left. They must have run into Lily in the common room and told her all about it, because soon she entered the hospital wing.

"Have you been fighting?" she asked Severus reproachfully.

"We were the only ones not fighting," Severus protested.

"It's true," said Remus. "The spells rebounded. Rotten luck for the pacifists."

Lily relaxed and sat down on Severus' bed. He felt glad to have a sympathetic visitor, and Lily made an excellent one, when she was in the mood. When Lily and Severus were small, they had read the Chronicles of Narnia, and Severus had pretended in his mind that she was Lucy and he was Edmund. Or Eustace. Someone grumpy and selfish that Lily could then save with her sisterly kindness and healing cordial. If she was his sister, he could live in the nice Evans house with her rosy mum and funny dad. Even having Petunia as an older sister would be worth it. For now, though, it was enough that she had come to his bedside, family or not. Good old Lily.

"I know you can't get up, so I brought my Cat's Cradle string," she said. "I remember you used to like it."

Severus smiled. He'd taken it for a girls' game when he'd seen Lily and Petunia playing at first, but it was relaxing. He formed the first position of the game on his fingers. Lily deftly pulled the string off and formed the Soldier's Bed. Odd the things you never forgot how to do even when you hadn't done them in years.

"What's that you're doing?" asked Remus, mildly interested.

Lily glanced at Severus for approval.

"Come over here and see," Severus said politely. "We can play with three."

Remus squeezed himself onto the bed with them.

"Pinch the strings in the middle, like this," Severus showed him, "and then sort of pull them under."

It took Remus a few tries to learn all the positions, and he never could quite get the hang of Candles. But the three of them enjoyed themselves. Severus hadn't realized how much he missed this sort of thing; the third years all seemed much too grown up to play kids' games anymore.

As they played, Lily asked them about the new subjects they were taking this year, and she and Remus complained about Arithmancy. Severus, who was taking Care of Magical Creatures for its potential connection to Potions, gave an animated description of Professor Kettleburn chasing after a loose manticore, which made them all laugh. Soon enough, though, Lily had to go.

Remus remained on Severus' bed for the moment.

"The Rule of the Shield is only for kinsmen, isn't it?" he said to Severus.

"Right," said Severus, who remembered Flitwick saying something about it when they had started Shield Charms in Dueling Club.

Remus said, "Bit of a stretch for your roommates to say you had to Shield them, then."

"You think they consider me kin?" Severus asked anxiously.

"Well," said Remus, "only when it's convenient for them."

Severus looked down at his sheets.

"Why," said Remus, "did you want -"

Severus wrapped his hands around his elbows, worried about where this conversation was going.

"I understand, you know," said Remus.

He didn't say anything else, but he didn't get up, either.

"You don't," whispered Severus.

Remus pulled up his knees. "Before Hogwarts ... let's just say we moved around a lot."

Severus could fancy that he did understand, at that.

"You don't have to be friends with Mulciber and Avery, though," Remus pointed out. "There's always the Slytherin girls, or the Ravenclaws or Hufflepuffs, or the students in other years."

Severus didn't fancy befriending the Slytherin girls. They weren't quite as nice as the Scotch lasses. As for the Scotch lasses themselves, Mary and Marlene didn't seem to care for him.

"Sure, and you don't have to be friends with people who try to kill each other over sports matches," Severus pointed out.

Remus nodded. "Yeah, that was a bit much. To be honest, I don't even care about Quidditch."

"You could always befriend a Hufflepuff," suggested Severus.

Remus lay back on the bed, top and tail with Severus. "The Hufflepuff boys in our year aren't bad, actually. I quite like Henry."

"You'd like to snog him, then," said Severus. "Just like every girl in our year."

Remus grabbed one of Severus' rubbery legs and pulled on it playfully. "It isn't his fault he's good looking, though, is it? He's a nice bloke, that's why they all like him."

"He's a Hufflepuff," Severus pointed out. "They're all like that. Nice, but boring. Probably sit around their common room knitting socks and playing gobstones."

"You just played Cat's Cradle with me," Remus pointed out. "Might be nice, actually. What do you suppose the Ravenclaws do in their common room at night?"

"I don't know, jigsaw puzzles?" Severus guessed.

"What if all the houses hosted some sort of visiting evening," Remus mused, "where the other houses could come, and they could entertain them?"

"That could be good," said Severus, looking up at the ceiling. "Inter house unity, and all that. Mind you, no one would come visit us in the dungeon."

"I would," said Remus. "Just to see what you came up with. Something ambitious, probably."

"Roland Perks doing his knife spinning tricks, maybe," said Severus.

"You have a student who does tricks with knives?" Remus asked, interested.

"He thinks they're tricks. Everyone else is tired of them," said Severus.

Remus laughed. "It gets a bit boring around the castle sometimes. There's hardly even any fiction in the library. I thought Hogsmeade was going to be brilliant, but it's just a town, really. I just end up spending hours in Zonko's waiting for my friends to be done ogling the joke items."

"Where would you go in Hogsmeade if you were on your own?" Severus asked.

Remus shrugged. "I'd like to try the tea shop, but Sirius said it was too girly."

"Yeah, I thought I'd like butterbeer, but I don't think it's for me," said Severus. "My dad likes his drink, and it's put me off alcohol for life, I think."

"Oh, sorry about that, mate," said Remus.

It occurred to Severus how very comfortable he felt in this bed, which was odd because it was far plainer than his nice four poster in the dormitory. For some reason, he could just tell Remus things, without even worrying what they were.

"I'd go with you to Puddifoot's," he said. "Sometime."

"Sometime," Remus agreed sleepily, getting up off Severus' bed and heading back to his own.

But both of them knew that 'sometime' meant 'never'.


	4. Sides

Severus stood in the corner of the classroom with Remus before Dueling Club, chatting about area of attack curses.

"They're an interesting side subject," said Remus, perched on the top of a desk, "but most of the time, you'd be better off trying to go for one opponent at a time, unless you're massively outnumbered and just want to slow them down enough to get away."

"They're meant for a large scale battle, though. Say you have a standard squad of four aurors, and your whole troop coordinated," said Severus, "you could do consistent damage."

"I suppose," Remus agreed. "But I don't think I'll find myself in any large scale battles any time soon."

Severus frowned. It was not so unlikely, not anymore. There was a new Dark wizard gaining prominence in the community. Julius seemed to worship Him. This year, Julius had been more vicious than ever in his skirmishes with the Gryffindors, even targeting the Scotch lasses, and Severus couldn't help but connect his behavior with Him. Rumor was that Lucius Malfoy had already joined Him, and many Slytherins seemed to think He had the right idea.

"What about the Death Eaters?" Severus asked Remus anxiously, giving voice for the first time to a fear that had been growing in him for awhile now.

Remus gave him a searching look. "Yes," he said carefully, "the large area spells might work against a gang of them. But let's hope they're gone before we're out of Hogwarts. The ministry have been passing a lot of laws lately, you know, cracking down on muggle baiting."

"Suppose they went after your mum and dad, though," said Severus.

Remus gave a little shiver that suggested he'd thought about this before. "My dad's a brilliant duelist," he said. "He's set up all sorts of security around our home, too. They're taking the threat very seriously."

Severus thought of his own mum and dad, cut off in the muggle world. His mum had dug out her old Runes textbook the previous summer and placed protections around her own house and the Evans home, but Severus doubted they were anything special. Could his mother handle multiple Death Eaters in a fight? He didn't think so. He only hoped her marriage to his dad wouldn't be enough to make her a target. It wasn't as if the Princes had been anyone important.

His mother had spoken of it briefly with him the night before Severus had left for his fourth year.

"Mum," he had asked her, sitting at the counter with a plate of biscuits, "what was it like growing up during the war?"

She seemed to know what he was getting at. "Awful," she said. "It was over before I left school, thankfully. But I remember the Chamber of Secrets opening when I was at Hogwarts, trying not to be alone in the hallways, hoping nobody found out my mother was a muggle. Visiting Beauxbatons for a gobstones tournament in 1944 that never happened because the school had been evacuated and Durmstrang wouldn't play with us anymore. Reading in the newspapers about the muggle war and the wizard war, feeding each other, worrying about my father being drafted into the muggle army. It was a dark time."

Severus had looked away from her. "Some of the Slytherins have been saying it might happen again, with ... with Lord Voldemort."

His mother had put a hand on his shoulder. "Listen, Severus, please don't get involved. Don't speak up either way. I don't want you joining any blood supremacists, our family being what it is, but you don't have to let your housemates know. Just keep your head down for a few years. This, too, will pass."

The conversation had not exactly dispelled his worries, and he couldn't help thinking it over every time the news was bad. If he, Severus, joined the Death Eaters, he could almost guarantee that his family would be taken off the list. Severus wasn't sure how he felt about them, though. He'd read a pamphlet which had talked about reuniting the muggle and wizarding worlds, which sounded fine to him, but he didn't see what that had to do with attacking ordinary people like the Evanses, or his mother. Perhaps He wasn't behind those crude attacks at all. It wasn't as if He gave interviews about His plans. The roving bands of wizards harming muggles could just be copycats.

Remus patted Severus on the shoulder. "It's all right," he said. "We've got years yet before we have to worry about that. All you need to worry about today is my Fire Hexes."

Severus gave him a half smile. Maybe he was getting ahead of himself. He was only fourteen. His mother knew best what would keep their family safe.

Just then, Sirius Black walked in. Remus turned his head from Severus a bit, but didn't actually walk away. Black approached Remus confidently.

"Want to be my partner, Moony?" he asked.

"I didn't know you fancied dueling," Remus said.

"Yeah, well," said Black, "I just opened the Daily Prophet to the smiling face of my cousin Bellatrix, arrested for attacking a muggle primary school. Half a dozen people have already come up to me this morning and told me that my family is scum and so am I. Most of them from Gryffindor. Thought it would be a good time to brush up on my attack skills."

Severus turned his eyes toward Sirius in interest. Bellatrix Black was with Him?

He wanted to ask Black what else he knew. Black didn't like him, of course, and would probably be suspicious. But for the first time in a long time, Severus was beginning to question his feud with the Gryffindors. Did it matter? What were they even fighting over, really, that was more important than innocent people being slaughtered? The House Cup? How juvenile. Suppose Severus stopped engaging with them: stopped cursing them back when they cursed him, stopped flinging childish insults, acted his age. It might take a bit, but things would cool down. His life might even get easier, with fewer enemies in it.

Because deep down, he wanted to throw in his lot with the anti-racists. For his mum and dad, and Lily, and Remus, and for plain old right and wrong. Maybe not as a soldier, but as an open supporter, someone with the confidence and self respect to say: I am against this. Could he have righteousness and safety and friendship, all at the same time?

Flitwick called the club to order. Since Remus was working with Sirius, Severus partnered with one of the Ravenclaws. His mind wasn't on his fire magic, and he got singed a few times. He was trying to think out what to say to Sirius. Finally, as the lesson wound down, he caught Remus and Sirius as they left.

"Sirius," he called.

Sirius whipped around. "What do you want, Snape?"

Severus inhaled. "I just wanted to say that I think it's brave of you not to support the Death Eaters like your family."

"Are you threatening me?" Sirius spat back.

"No," said Severus, hands up. "I've had people trying to get me to join them, too, and I know it isn't easy."

Remus smiled approvingly. Severus held out a moment of hope. There was something cathartic about being honest and mature for once.

Then, like a flash, Sirius lit his hair on fire.

Severus put it out, but not before a large amount of it had turned to ashes. By the time he'd cleaned himself up, Sirius was gone.

Remus shot Severus an apologetic look and followed his friend.


End file.
